My story isn’t as harrowing as many real cases of human trafficking. Thank God. But I think about this time in my life a lot—and how differently things could have turned out if I had been more naive or vulnerable.
In 2023, the U.S. National Human Trafficking Hotline received over 30,000 calls, identifying nearly 17,000 victims. Canada faces a serious trafficking crisis too—especially among young women.
This is how I unknowingly made myself vulnerable to a predator, and how I narrowly avoided becoming his victim.
Lonely in the City
In 2005, I was 21 years old and living in a new city with my unreliable boyfriend. He was “working” a lot (read: playing video games with his friends), and I spent most of my time alone. I had come from a very small town and had never lived—or even traveled—anywhere else before.
I tried to make the relationship and the new city work, but we lived in a scary (but affordable) neighborhood. There were drugs, pimps, and addicts everywhere. People were generally friendly and didn’t bother me much, but I missed home. I missed walking alone at night without fear.
Eventually, it became clear that my boyfriend was checked out, associating with losers, and not being faithful to me. He started spending most of his time at friend’s place while I worked and stayed in our apartment on the other side of town. One day, I found out he had invited a friend who was evading the law to live with us. That was the last straw: I was out.
I broke up with him in that moment, packed up my things, and a friend offered to drive me all the way home, two provinces over. The only catch: he couldn’t leave for another five days.
Meeting a Predator
While waiting for my ride, I stayed with my friend Mau. I was feeling emo, had already quit my job, and bored. So I decided to take a walk downtown, grab some pizza, kill some time, and reflect on the last few days.
I ended up sitting at an outdoor chess table eating lunch. I was enjoying my pizza—tearfully—trying to process everything, when a young man pulled up in a Mercedes.
He was tall, handsome, and well-dressed with dark curly hair. He walked over, sat down, and introduced himself. I don’t remember his name, but for the sake of the story, I’ll call him James.
James said he saw me sitting alone and figured he’d come say hello. He was funny and charming, and we chatted for a bit. I asked him what he did for work. With a mischievous grin, he said, “I get by!”
I laughed and replied, “Obviously—look at your car!”
He then asked me out on a date. I explained my situation and told him I was leaving in a few days.
He said, “Don’t leave. One date with me and you’ll never want to go home.”
At that point, I felt uneasy. He was pushing the idea hard, and I knew I needed to leave. I told him my friend was waiting for me and knew exactly where I was. He handed me a napkin with his number and said, “You’ll need this.”
Was I Almost a Victim of Human Trafficking?
I walked away feeling off about the whole interaction. When I got back to Mau’s place, she was home from work. I told her what happened.
She practically shouted, “Amy! That dude sounds like a literal pimp!”
Maureen had grown up in a nearby city and was much more street-smart than I was. That’s when everything clicked. All of the signs were there.
Let’s break them down:
- He approached me for no clear reason
- He was charming and had a “player” vibe
- He complimented me and love-bombed me from the start—one of the classic predator warning signs.
- I was clearly vulnerable: alone, broke, no family around
- He drove a very expensive car with no clear job title
- He was evasive about his profession
- He had no business card despite his supposed success
- He pushed me to stay even though we just met
- He ignored my “no” and kept pressing
Think about it: why would a wealthy, good-looking, well-dressed man spend time chatting with a tearful girl eating cold pizza in the street? Men with real money and options aren’t usually free on a weekday afternoon—and they’re definitely not lurking around city chess tables looking for crying strangers.
The answer is simple. He wasn’t just being friendly. He was a predator. And he had likely done this before, many times.
What I Did Wrong — And What I Did Right
Looking back, I can see that I made myself more vulnerable than I realized. But I also see the choices that helped me dodge a very dangerous situation. If you’ve ever felt unsure after a weird encounter, this breakdown might help you make sense of it — and stay safer next time.
What I Did Wrong
- I wandered around alone in a strange city while emotionally distressed.
I wasn’t in the right headspace. I was vulnerable, sad, and isolated — exactly the kind of state that predators look for. - I let my guard down because he was charming and well-dressed.
I assumed his appearance meant safety or credibility. But predators often use charm as a tool, not a trait. - I gave away too much information.
I told him I was leaving town soon, which confirmed that I had no support network nearby. That detail made me a more appealing target. - I didn’t trust my gut quickly enough.
I had an “off” feeling partway through the interaction, but I didn’t act on it immediately. I lingered longer than I should have.
The Smart Moves That Helped Me Avoid a Predator
This is what likely saved me. I may have been naive, but a few small choices helped me avoid what could have turned into a dangerous trafficking situation.
I trusted my instincts and walked away.
Even though it took me a few minutes, I did remove myself from the situation. That decision likely protected me from something far worse.
I stayed in a public space.
Being outdoors in the daytime likely saved me. Predators are less likely to act when witnesses are around.
I said someone knew where I was.
Telling him that my friend was expecting me — and knew my exact location — added a layer of accountability that may have discouraged him from pushing further.
I didn’t give him my number.
I took his instead. That’s a crucial difference. Giving away your number gives someone direct access to you — and control over future contact.
How to Spot a Human Trafficking Trap
It’s easy to assume you’d know if something shady was going on. But the truth is, human trafficking often begins with kindness, charm, or what feels like a romantic spark. It doesn’t always look like a van pulling up or someone physically forcing you into a situation. Sometimes, it starts with a guy like James—clean-cut, well-spoken, and seemingly harmless. That’s why understanding the red flags is so important.
Classic Signs You’re Walking Into a Human Trafficking Trap
They “accidentally” find you when you’re alone and vulnerable.
Traffickers often scan public places for people who look out of place or emotionally distressed. If someone zeroes in on you without a clear reason, especially when you’re alone, trust your gut.
They avoid answering questions directly.
Vague answers about their job, where they live, or who they’re with? That’s a red flag. If someone’s story doesn’t add up, there’s probably a reason.
They love-bomb or flatter you instantly.
Excessive compliments, promises of a better life, or trying to make you feel “special” right away is a manipulation tactic. It’s designed to create emotional dependency fast.
They’re overly generous or insistent.
Offering money, a place to stay, or gifts out of the blue? It might seem generous, but it’s often a way to create a sense of obligation—or dependency.
What Human Traffickers Hope You’ll Ignore
They don’t respect your “no.”
If someone keeps pushing after you’ve said you’re not interested (in a date, a job, a trip, anything), that’s not persistence—it’s coercion.
They isolate or pressure you to leave your current situation.
Traffickers often try to separate you from your support system. If they’re pressuring you to stay longer, move somewhere new, or “start over,” that’s a major red flag.
Something just feels “off.”
Even if you can’t explain why—listen. Your instincts exist for a reason. Don’t brush off that inner voice that says this doesn’t feel right.
Gut instinct is one of the greatest gifts we have been given. This instinct helped our ancestors fend for themselves with no weapons but their own hands and mind. And today it’s just as powerful! To learn more about the gift of instinct, check out our article Instinct and Safety: Why Your Gut Feelings Matter.
No One Thinks It’ll Be Them — Until It Almost Is
Human trafficking doesn’t always start with violence. Sometimes, it starts with a conversation at a chess table, a napkin with a phone number, and the illusion of being seen and wanted. That’s why we need to talk about it—not to scare each other, but to stay one step ahead of those who exploit vulnerability. You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be aware.
Do you have a story about how you narrowly escaped human trafficking, potential abuse, or drink drugging? Share your stories and talk to others who have gone through the same thing in the comments below.
Be aware, and stay safe!
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